Going back...

... is not an option.

My life will never be the same, but it will turn (is turning now, with or without my assent) in a new direction. When I was diagnosed with cancer 22 years ago and going through chemotherapy treatments, I cried that I wanted my old life back... I wanted things the way they used to be. But that is never possible. I became a woman who survived cancer. The process changed me and my family.

So now I must figure out my new life. I can't have things the way they were and to try would keep me rooted in this place of sadness and melancholy.