I am tired. Tired of trying to be positive. Tired of pretending that one of these days, it will be alright. Tired of dotting the i's and crossing the t's, because you are not allowed to mourn and grieve without the proper paperwork being notarized, filed and delivered along with copies of every certificate a person is issued in this life. I am tired. I don't think I have the strength to push forward, without a promise. I need a promise... that someday the bad dreams will only own the night... that someday I will know for sure that he is in a better place... that someday the knowledge that I will never hear his voice again will not break my heart.
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